Life Lately

I have a dream of having a smooth morning that entails quiet coffee time, exercise, a peaceful breakfast with the kids, and uninterrupted chore time.

No breakfast table disasters, tantrums, accidents, or minor injuries: is that too much to ask for?

Yes. Yes, it is.

As a relatively new mom, I’ve had to adjust my expectations of reality by 1000%. Having a toddler has wildly challenged my notions of what is realistic when it comes to peace, productivity, and socialization.

For example: In theory, going out for a playdate sounds like the perfect win-win. Monica plays, I converse—what could go wrong? In reality, I spend about 76% of this outing making sure Monica is not hurting herself, hurting others, or escaping. 23% of the time apologizing to someone for something Monica did, and 1% actually interacting with the person I was meeting up with. Does that math add up? I think so. In any case, not a win-win.

This type of disappointment happens all the time. A ‘simple’ task like folding laundry turns into a mediation between Monica and Henry over a toy farm and half of the clean clothes end up on the floor instead of folded and put away. Everything takes longer, and it often comes at the expense of another to-do manifesting itself in the form of major damage control from whatever the kids were doing while I was working.

Often I find myself brainstorming strategies to mitigate these challenges, little things I can do or change to make my day go smoothly. And let me be clear, I do think these solutions exist and can make a difference. However, I’ve come to realize that part of the problem is my feelings of crushing disappointment that accompanies every mishap or derailment.

The solution to this is simply adjusting my expectations: hope for the best, plan for the worst. I have learned that if I expect setbacks, delays, messes, and 5000 interruptions—it won’t hurt so much when they come.

Not only does this greatly influence my state of mind, but it also helps me handle whatever scenario more gracefully—which is actually more efficient than storming around the house for 30 minutes after a failed attempt to quickly empty the dishwasher.

I have to go to expectation rehab. Change my mindset on how the day ‘should’ go and just work with what I get. This doesn’t mean the downfall of high ideals, it just means finding peace in all circumstances—even the chaotic ones—while still persevering in the tasks at hand.

So who’s coming with me?

Inspo

I know it may seem a little gouache to cite myself as inspiring, but I wrote a piece for Radiant magazine I think you might like! It’s not much about myself as much as it is about my grandmother’s legacy of beauty in the home that she left behind. She is one of the reasons I have high ideals for my home, my family, and my life. Here it is in case you want to read! They also have other wonderful articles on there worth reading.

Pretty things

I’ve been excited to share this one! Stephen’s family goes to the Outer Banks every year for a week during the summer. We haven’t been able to go every time but this year we made it! One thing I wanted was a cute, modest bathing suit that would work with carrying babies on the beach. I fell in love with this one from Siena Co. It is absolutely adorable and fits me like a glove. It is SO flattering!

If you’re in the market for a beautiful, timeless bathing suit that you can wear for years to come—this is it. And they gave me a discount code! If you use MIRANDA10 at checkout, you’ll get 10% off your order.

In camaraderie,

Miranda Kate